Welcome to the Real World full of deadlines, bills, limited vacation time, mortgages, and student loans. 401Ks and credit scores suddenly define who you are. We replaced juice boxes with half price margaritas and our lunch hour with a quick lunch at our desk. Many of us still look forward to that midday “recess,” whether to indulge in coffee or the latest office gossip. The promise of freedom in the Real World seems more like an urban legend. In reality, it feels like we are all still smiling awkwardly behind a mouth full of braces.

Many call the awkward phase from an individual’s twenties to early thirties, the Quarterlife Crisis. This is the time when people transition from adolescence to adulthood. Suddenly a new population fills the work force, and, in most cases, they have no preparation whatsoever with balancing a checkbook, taking care of a household, or investing their paycheck.

In college, there were plenty of classes to choose from, but most colleges didn’t offer “how to be a grown-up”; therefore, most recent graduates are left to fend for themselves and maybe surf the web in hopes of finding some helpful hints using Google.

Unlike our older counterparts, who suffer the more widely known Crisis, the Quarterlife Crisis has other preoccupations. It is a crisis of identity, when people are struggling to figure out exactly who they are and who they should be. Often times there are so many choices it is difficult to make a decision. Similar to ordering food at a restaurant with a 20 page menu, how do they pinpoint exactly what they want to indulge in?

People who experience the crisis constantly compare themselves to their peers and set up unreasonable expectations for themselves. They may also feel a strong nostalgia for their childhood or college days. They fear failure and worry that they won’t be able to measure up or handle the new responsibilities in their life. Decisions are hard to make as they constantly change their minds. Most often it is the uncertainty of what they want out of life that creates the most anxiety.

Ravina Daphtary also felt the pangs of confusion after graduating college and decided to create her blog, Kill Your Twenties. She created it as a forum where other twentysomethings could air their frustrations about the time in their lives they had been looking forward to and were now quickly becoming disillusioned with.

“The blog has been, more than anything, a means of not feeling alone in my anxiety,” said Daphtary. The contributors are mostly Daphtary, her friends, and other readers who have stumbled onto the site. She has gotten great feedback from people, often times offering some solidarity with a short “me too,” by others who are experiencing the same problems.

“I have found people really willing to share their experiences and frustrations. And I have certainly been comforted by other people’s posts,” said Daphtary.

There are a few guidebooks that people can use to gain some insight. On the heels of their own Quarterlife Crisis, Alexandra Robbins and Abby Wilner wrote the book Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties, which offers advice to bemused twentysomething year olds. Robbins went on to write a follow up book where people asked questions and others offered their personal experience.

These books give young people insight from all sorts of topics and questions that may be plaguing them such as: How do I find my passion?; When do I let go of my dream?; Should I do what I love or what will make me the most money?; How do I know if I’m dating the one?

Not everyone is sympathetic. There are people who think that Quarterlife Crisis sufferers are a bunch of over-privileged, unappreciative whiners who have the world at their fingertips and just can’t seem to get it together. They are probably right. After all, there are more options to choose from and more opportunities to take advantage of than ever before. Perhaps we should be more appreciative that we can choose our future and don’t have to work for survival, in which case we wouldn’t have time to complain.

It could be worse. We could be flipping burgers or wearing a funny uniform at our local convenience store. But didn’t our forefathers and real fathers come to this country so that their children could have a better future full of opportunity and angst? I digress.

Admittedly, it can be a little overwhelming if you have everything within your reach. What do you choose? I, for one, have suffered some of the symptoms. I didn’t quit my job to join a band, have an affair with the gardener, or buy a lifetime supply of Rogaine; however, I did quit my job and move to Canada, made a few romantic blunders, and bravely told an eccentric hair stylist with a pixie cut to do whatever she wanted to my hair.

In retrospect, it probably wasn’t the best idea to trust someone holding seven-inch hair sheers to the back of my neck. But a year later, not much harm was done; in fact, I’m back where I started, including a fair knowledge of French, thicker skin, and considerably shorter hair.

The secret to conquering such fears and confusion is realizing that many other people are experiencing the same thing. There is no rule book or game plan you should be following. If you do, you will restrict yourself from fully enjoying the time for self-discovery. It is necessary to make mistakes and unlike our midlife crisis counterparts we are granted more room for error. For that we should be grateful.